Wonder Woman Turns 600

The trinity of superheroes at DC Comics are all celebrating milestones this month.  Batman and Superman both reached their 700th issues.  And now there's Wonder Woman, reaching her 600th.  It's not technically her 600th, but since her first volume contained 329 issues, her second 226, and her third 44, if you add them all up, the next issue would be 600.  And that works for me, because I think she deserves to be recognized for surviving so long as an under-appreciated character.  

Wonder Woman's milestone turned out to be the best of the three (save the best for last?).  The first story within Wonder Woman #700 was beautifully written by Gail Simone.  It was drawn by and "inspired by" the ever-fantastic George Perez and I see why.  The tale harkened back to when George Perez took the reigns of Wonder Woman back in the 1980s and gave her a fresh start and look. Diana was a fish out of water back then, and I was very happy to see the return of Julia and Vanessa Kapatelis.  It was a return to the uncomplicated stories that were full of heart and not so Greek god- or Amazonian-based. 

The next two stories featured Power Girl and Superman, respectively.  Two mighty players she could team up with against a powerful villain.  Instead, she dealt with both on a humanistic/personal level.   Power Girl's story was a little silly, but still cute.  I thought it was great that Power Girl looked up to Wonder Woman as an idol, even for the smallest  advice about her cat (no sexual pun intended). 

I'm not quite sure what to think of the last story in the giant-sized issue.  It's a lead-in to the future storyline of Wonder Woman starting in issue #601.  It features Wonder Woman's new costume, which is all abuzz in the news.  To me, the storyline seems kinda Lost-ish.  From my understanding, time has been shifted, Paradise Island has been destroyed, and she had a different origin story, hence the new costume which, by the way, is very Black Canary-ish.  (That's my second "-ish" in case you're keeping count.)  She has to try to get time back in alignment?  At least that's what I got out of it.  Hmmm... I'm not so sure about that direction, if that's what it is.  That seems beyond the scope of Wonder Womandom and a bit overdone.  DC has been doing too much lately with parallel worlds/earths and time travel (Bruce Wayne coming back to "life," Booster Gold bebopping all over the time continuum, bringing Superboy back to life from the future, the Legion of Superheroes going back and forth between their time and ours, etc.).  

I'll keep reading Wonder Woman, though, because I'm curious about her future.  And she needs all the support she can get!  (Again, no sexual pun intended.)  Here's to another 600 issues!  (Let's hope she never has another #1.)

Superman Turns 700

Superman reached his 700th issue last week, following Batman's disappointing 700th the week before.  Ironically, Batman started in 1940 while Superman started in 1939.

Superman's milestone was much better than Batman's.  Both issues contained a few short stories starring the title character, but Superman's was tied to current storylines or past history, whereas Batman's were just random bullshit.  In fact, Superman #700 contained a story that teamed him up with the original Robin, Batman's former partner, in a story set back in time.  Batman/Bruce Wayne appeared briefly and his appearance here was still better than the stories from his own 700th issue.  It provided a fun reading, seeing Superman play the adult mentor to the teenage Robin.  This was my favorite story of the three; however, it was more of a story for Robin than Superman.  I love the original Robin, though, so I was content.

Another story within the issue focused on Superman's reunion with his wife, Lois Lane, after the events from the "War of the Supermen" and "New Krypton" sagas that have run in all of the Superman books over the past couple of years.   I appreciated being let into Superman's personal life, as it's something that we haven't had a glimpse of in quite some time.  It made him -- for lack of a better term -- "human."  (Although hearing Superman and Lois confess their love to one another over and over again got a bit redundant.)

The third and final story within Superman #700 lays the groundwork for the upcoming "Grounded" storyline that will see Superman walking across the U.S. from Philadelphia to Seattle, stopping at cities and small towns in between, so he can reconnect with his fan base on their level.   I like that this will give Superman a more personal approach, but he can't be there to save people's everyday lives.  Hello!  He's not Sup-- Well, I guess he is.  But still...

So, while $4.99 seems a little steep for what we got, it was money better spent than Batman #700.  It didn't suck.

Batman Turns 700

Batman's 700th issue just came out, with Superman's 700th and Wonder Woman's 600th to follow this summer.  So why does it not feel like much of a celebration?

Batman #700 was written entirely by the questionably talented Grant Morrison.  It's unfortunate that DC Comics relies too heavily on Grant Morrison to bring Batman to the world.  His writing is so divisive; there's no middle ground.  People either really love him or really hate him.  For that reason, his stories exclude a large portion of the audience that DC is trying to reach.  

Batman #700 was divided up into short, separate tales that included past, present, and future Batmans (i.e., Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, and Damian Wayne, respectively).  Again, like with his "Batman RIP" storyline, I think Morrison was using hallucinogens whilst writing these tales.  The stories -- and I use that term loosely -- weren't entertaining, weren't grabbing, weren't noteworthy, and definitely weren't substantial enough to warrant placement in the milestone 700th issue of Batman.  Furthermore, they didn't fit in with any of the current Batman storylines going on.  In fact, the recent Riddler one-shot was better written, certainly a lot more entertaining, and offered a better value for the $2.99 cover price.  The rest (almost half) of the $4.99 issue was filler, featuring Batman art from different artists, a layout of the Batcave that we've most likely seen before, and um...well, that's it. 

All in all, Batman #700 was a big disappointment.  Better luck with #800, Batman.  I hope Superman and Wonder Woman receive a better treatment for their upcoming milestones. 

And now, I leave you with a message from Grant Morrison:

DC Takes a Crap on the Teen Titans

I know that I recently reviewed the downward spiral that is DC Comics' Teen Titans, but after reading the latest issue (Teen Titans #83), it bears repeating.  Why has DC decided to crap on the Teen Titans? 

When Geoff Johns revamped the Teen Titans and wrote for the first 40 or so issues, the Teen Titans were fantastic.  Again.  The writing harkened back to the days of Marv Wolfman writing the New Teen Titans back in the 80s.  Now, I'm not saying that Johns is the end-all and be-all of comic book writers.  He's great, but I think there are a lot of other talented writers out there as well. 

After Johns, Sean McKeever took over the Teen Titans and it was tolerable.  Not great, but tolerable.  It's like he was keeping them afloat until DC could find another suitable writer to be Johns' worthy successor.  Now DC has brought onboard Felicia D. Henderson who has absolutely no comic book or superhero writing experience.  Her background includes TV series like Fringe; Gossip Girl; Everybody Hates Chris; Soul Food; Sister, Sister; Family Matters; and Moesha.  The last time I checked, the Teen Titans wasn't a cheesy family sitcom.  Wait a minute...scratch that.

With Henderson, Teen Titans has gone from mediocre to bad.  I know the Teen Titans features teenage characters, but does the writing have to appear like it was written BY a teenager?  The storyline and dialogue are amateurish at best. 

Here are some examples from the latest issue, #83:

Blue Beetle: "Want to go get something to eat?"
Static: "Thanks, man.  But I'm spent. Think I'll raid the fridge and crash."
Blue Beetle: "Dakota was crazy, huh?"
Static: "Much and very."
Blue Beetle: "Everything okay, with the fam?"
Static: "Yeah.  You know. They miss me. I miss them."

Later...
Static: "Hey, I decided I wanna go out and get something to -- looks like you're taking off."
Blue Beetle: "Have to."
Static: "What's wrong?"
Blue Beetle: "Holocaust nearly killed us.  Something weird's going on with Miss Martian. We're going to have to go to another dimension to find Raven. Who knows what we'll face? Who knows if we'll get back? I need to see my mom."
Static: "I feel you."

Superboy: "She's acting all weird like she doesn't want me around.  And it's getting really old, really fast."
Impulse: "If you don't know what's going on, why don't you ask her?"
Superboy:  "Because if Cassie [Wonder Girl] doesn't wanna be with me she should just say so."

Wonder Girl: "Can we talk?"
Superboy: "Yeah.  Come on in.  So...what's up with you?"
Wonder Girl: "Nothing.  I mean, everything.  In case you haven't noticed, Raven's missing, and I'm the leader now, and it's a lot of pressure, and --"
Cut to: Superboy kissing Wonder Girl up against the wall.
Superboy: "That make it better?"
Wonder Girl: "No...make it harder."

Huh?

Superboy: "...anyway, we're kissing.  It's heated.  I'm thinking, we're fine!  But then Rochelle busts in."
Impulse:  "No way."
Superboy: "Oh yes."
Impulse: "Don't worry, dude. She's hot and she carries around her own rope.  You'll get together again."
In walks Wonder Girl: "Unfortunately, we're together right now."
Superboy: "Cassie!  Can you just tell me what's going on?"
Wonder Girl: "Are you serious?"
Superboy: "I know how it sounded but I was just getting advice."
Wonder Girl: "I'm the leader here. How's the team going to respect that with you sharing my business like that?"
Superboy: "I'm sorry."
Wonder Girl: "And that helps me how?"

Wonder Girl: "Lorena, have you ever been to that undersea area?"
Aquagirl: "No.  No one has.  Down that deep there are sea creatures unlike any other.  Some are really dangerous."
Bombshell: "She's asking if you can handle the pressure, water wimp."
Aquagirl: "You're two seconds from finding out how lucky you are to have an onsite operating room."
Wonder Girl: "Are you serious?  Get it together, you two."

Are YOU serious, DC?  Get it together. 

Why am I complaining so much?  Because I have an emotional investment in the Teen Titans that dates back to the 80s.  Because I hate to see them -- for lack of a better term -- crapped on.  And because DC is charging $3.99 a comic for a horribly written superhero team comic book that features equally horribly written back-up features.   I was relieved when the Ravager back-up tale (written by the aforementioned Sean McKeever) was ending and looking forward to the new Coven story featuring Black Alice.  After reading the first installment, I have to wonder:  Is Gail Simone the only writer that can pull off the under-used, weird, and dark Black Alice?

Sorry.  I just had to vent.  With so many quality DC comics out there, why do the Teen Titans have to suffer?

Watch Her Pull A Rabbit Out Of Her Hat

I admit that I've never been a big fan of Zatanna, the magical sorceress in the DC Universe.  I've always felt she was a weak character and wore a costume too closely resembling Black Canary's.  Mostly, though, it's always bugged me to have to read her magical spells written sdrawkcab.  (That's "backwards," folks.  See?  Annoying, right?)  It's always slowed down the reading process for me and made me lose interest when she'd jump into the ring in a Justice League of America battle. 

When DC Comics announced that Zatanna was getting her own monthly series, I wondered why.  I wondered why because I was curious why the Powers-That-Be thought that this supporting character was strong enough to carry her own series.  With so many interesting heroines, why should Zatanna warrant a starring role?  

I picked up Zatanna #1 this past week and found myself enjoying it (despite the backwards spells).  What intrigued me most was the writing.  Paul Dini provides some sharp dialogue and witty banter between Zatanna and her newly introduced supporting characters.  I felt like I was watching an early episode of Moonlighting.  I also love it when writers incorporate the hero's (or heroine's) personal/private life into the comic, as Dini did in issue #1.  I feel like after thirty years, I am finally getting to know who Zatanna is.  Lastly, I appreciated that the story (and hopefully future stories) takes place in San Francisco, away from popular cities in the DC Universe as Metropolis or Gotham City.  Sure, the Teen Titans make their home in San Francisco, but are they really ever there anymore?  (See my TT review.) 

As long as these elements hold true, I'll be reading Zatanna.  Or rather, I'll be reading (albeit slowly) Annataz.