The Silly X-Men

I've been reading the new Wolverine and the X-Men comic that resulted from the team "Schism."  Now, it doesn't take a marketing genius to know that the split of the 500+ issue series Uncanny X-Men into two new series (a new Uncanny X-Men series and a Wolverine and the X-Men series) was just an excuse to increase sales because X-Men-related comics are the biggest sellers.  I guess DC was offering more Batman monthly titles and Marvel had to find a way to compete.  

Naturally, I'm one of the gullible souls who was reading only the original Uncanny X-Men (no X-Men Legacy, Astonishing X-Men, or even just X-Men) but now have been purchasing Uncanny X-Men and Wolverine and the X-Men at $3.99 each, so they got me for an extra $4 per month.  And lately, they've been releasing each comic twice monthly, so they're making an extra $12 from me every month. 

The extra money spent wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the awful product I'm getting in return.  I'm speaking specifically of Wolverine and the X-Men, which should really be retitled as The Silly X-Men.  Yes, Wolverine does appear in the comic (although seriously, what comic doesn't Wolverine currently appear in?).  However, it's primarily about a bunch of young silly mutants that I don't even know or care to know.  Quentin Quire?  Who the hell is he?  Isn't he the oversexed dude on Family Guy?  Oh, no, wait.  My bad.  He's a stupid punk-ass kid with pink hair, a la Perez Hilton.  Or, as I like to refer to him, the Danny Chase of the X-Men.  (See: When the New Teen Titans Went South.) 

I liked the concept of the "Schism" storyline wherein Cyclops would lead a team of X-Men off the coast of San Francisco on Utopia and Wolverine would start up a new school in Westchester, NY.  I also liked that Wolverine and the X-Men promised to feature Wolverine, Kitty Pryde, and the Beast teaching at the new Jean Grey School.  Sadly, we barely get glimpses of Kitty Pryde, Beast, or even Wolverine (!).  We mostly see these younger X-Men in training.  And they're not even the good Young X-Men.  Where are the characters from the Young X-Men short-lived series?  Dust?  Anole?  Graymalkin?  These characters had depth and personality.  The current motley crew consist of a bunch of whiny, annoying brats whose names I don't even know.

So, Marvel, I'm taking my $4 (or $8) and putting it toward the new Astonishing X-Men.  With Marjorie Liu scripting and Northstar making headlines, it's bound to be the better pick. 

DC's Newest Comics

DC Comics announced today four new monthly series beginning this fall:  “Night of the Owls” spinoff Talon, the fantasy Sword of Sorcery (anchored by “Amethyst, Princess of Gemworld” with a “Beowulf” back-up), The Phantom Stranger, and the DCU/Wildstorm-merging Team Seven. I've already commented on Sword of Sorcery, so now I'll take a moment to comment on the others based on the information DC provided in their press release and images: 

Team 7?  Seriously?  A group of Punishers?  Pass.  

Does anyone really think that the Phantom Stranger can carry his own comic book series?  He may be okay as part of a team-up book, but no one's ever said, "The Phantom Stranger is my favorite superhero," have they?  

I will point out, though, that his newest look somewhat resembles one of my favorite character's costumes, Obsidian, who apparently doesn't exist in DC's New 52 because of his now-gay dad, Alan Scott, the original Green Lantern.  Sigh... :(

Of the four new announced series, Talon probably has the greatest chance of survival.  It has a good title and an interesting new character and scenario.

So, will I pick these up?  I probably will, except for Team 7, just to see what they're about.  But I don't imagine staying with them unless they're exceptional.  I'm already considering dropping a lot of my favorite pre-New 52 mainstays like Teen Titans because I'm not particular fond of the new vision.

The Return of Amethyst (but probably not for long)

DC Comics announced today four new series that will begin in Fall 2012.  One of them features the return of Amethyst, Princess of Gemworld (happy squeal!). 

When I was a teenager, I loved the 1983 twelve-issue maxi-series of Amethyst, followed by the sixteen-issue monthly series.  After Amethyst became this weird mystic and Lord of Order, though, Amethyst's subsequent appearances (and mini-series) were pretty lame.  She was no longer youthful and innocent.  She was just another other-worldly being.  She was at her best being this teenage girl who (like Billy Batson) became an adult superhero.  Her situation was different than Captain Marvel/Shazam's in that she only became Amethyst when she stepped into another dimension, the dimension of Gemworld with its twelve individually gem-themed kingdoms.

From DC's press release:

SWORD OF SORCERY – Writer: Christy Marx. Artist: Aaron Lopresti.
Featuring the return of Amethyst, Amy Winston leads a strange life on the road with her mother and resents it. She’s about to learn it’s all been necessary when she discovers she’s the lost princess of Gemworld—and she’s being hunted by her murderous aunt. With a back-up story written by Tony Bedard with art by Jesus Saiz, set in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, the monstrous warrior Beowulf is charged with finding and defeating the evil Grendel.

My first impression?  The comic's title sucks.  A good title is the first key to success.  I get that DC is trying to revive their old, old titles (and probably keep their copyrights), but this title alone will drive it into cancellation.  Example: the first Sword and Sorcery from 1973 only lasted five issues. 

Worse than that, there's a back-up story, which means the comic will most likely cost $3.99 instead of $2.99.  How many $3.99 comics out there survive today, other than X-Men or Batman-related titles?  

With all these obstacles stacked against her, DC isn't even giving Amethyst a fair chance to start.  I also hope they don't fuck up her origin/story like they have with so many other characters during this recent New 52 reboot.  I have too many fond memories of the Princess of Gemworld.  

 

Sayonara, Daken

Daken #23 (final issue)

With issue #23 of Daken: Dark Wolverine, we say goodbye to Wolverine's son.  SPOILER: It's not only the last issue of the series, but Daken supposedly dies.  Of course, we all know how that goes in the superhero world.  After a few months of no appearances, he'll show up again.  Maybe in Marvel's new Dark Avengers ongoing series.   

It's quite sad to see Daken lose his own series.  He's a very intriguing and complex character, and I'm sure there are many excellent storylines that writer Rob Williams could have come up with for future issues.  Sadly, we'll never see them.  Instead, we'll see dozens of mediocre Avengers and X-Men comics on the shelves featuring the same characters over and over and over.  (Yes, I'm talking to you, Wolverine and Spider-Man.)

Daken #10

Daken had such great, well-written storylines when he took over Wolverine's own series for awhile that he was given his own monthly series.  Unfortunately, Daken's self-titled series started out a bit slow with the ho-hum "Wolverine Goes to Hell" and Madripoor storylines.  However, it quickly livened up when Daken hit Hollywood and writer Rob Williams came onboard and shook things up, showing us why we fell in love with Daken in the first place.  He's a bad boy.  And who doesn't love a bad boy?  I guess it was too late at this point, though.  Readers had already jumped ship and sales declined enough to warrant Daken's cancellation.  Such a pity.  Wolverine appears in all the X-books (literally) and yet his more complex, mysterious, hot-headed, selfish, bi-sexual son can't even get one. 

Here's hoping that Marvel sees the error of their ways...and Daken never does.

Batman Overload

Batman #7 (volume two)

I just caught up reading three months of Batman (#s 5-7) where he is being "judged" by the Court of Owls.  Unfortunately, while the lead-up to the Court of Owls in earlier Batman issues was intriguing, these last few issues felt like a throwback to Grant Morrison's awful RIP story where Batman was delusional, hallucinating, etc. and the story went nowhere.  However, in the New 52, I'm not sure any of that RIP stuff even happened now.  But I do know that it's definitely re-happening in my head and giving me a headache and a case of the boredoms.  Let's hope Batman picks up soon before I drop this DC mainstay from my reading list.

While I'm on the subject of Batman and Grant Morrison, I'd like to comment that the latest Batman, Inc. series, with its first issue being released in May 2012. 

Batman Inc. #1 (volume two)

First issue summary: The series hits the ground running as BATMAN and ROBIN face off against the assassin GOATBOY! LEVIATHAN'S sinister mission revealed!

Second issue summary: This is the story of a man and a woman fighting over the heart and soul of their child. Unfortunately for the world, the man is BATMAN, the woman is TALIA AL GHUL, and the child is DAMIAN.

Where does the "Inc." in Batman, Inc. come into play?  I thought the intent was to be about an international web of Batman-related heroes?   Sounds to me like another Batman title to make money off the masses.  Because Batman, Detective Comics, Batman: The Dark Knight, and Batman & Robin weren't enough?  And that's not even including his appearances in Justice League or Justice League International.  Now that there's only one Batman in the New DC 52, where does he find the time?  If Batman needs a personal assistant to keep track of his calendar, I'm available.